Had a talk with BF today.
Met him up in the TP lib. We then headed the playground near my block.
The main motive was to talk things out and try to resolve things.
As it seemed that talking on the phone the night before didnt make any difference.
Instead, it added salts to the wound.

We talked about everything.
Yes everything. From friends, schools to family and whatever came to mind.
It was a very good talk. I then realised life isnt as easy as i thought.
As i get older, more probs will arise. However that hurdles are actually meant to strengthen myself. In both mentally and physically. As when i get more older, especially when i enter working life, more challenges will come my way. And this is just a start. All this while, ive been living in a world of fantasy, with a happy ending. Now is the time for me to stand up on my two feet and experience the reality world, full of obstructions and patience.

That was when i wailed for my late grandma. I cried and pleaded for her come back. Bf then told me something. Something stunned me completely. I acted as if i wanna snatch grandma from God when He prefers grandma to be with Him. Instantly i broke into tears. How could I? How could i forget about the 6th term in rukun iman which is ''Beriman kepada qada' dan qadar Nya'' Astagfiruallahazim. Hais. Even though at tis point of time, i need her real bad, i have to let her go. Ever since her departure from this world, everything became different.

p/s: Thanks MRbf for everything, for hearing me out. Im very thankful. Seriously after telling u about everything, i felt at ease, Really. Jgn fikir bkn2 ye... (=

And now, problems arose btween Girlfriends. I noe you girls are hurt, disappointed and depressed. I myself feel the same way too. Do believe that in every trials and sorrows he shoulders us, God has a reason. And im sure everything will be solved soon. It definitely will. Bcause nothing, nothing's gonna break us apart, not even Boyfriends. Let us go through this obstacles together and substantially fortified our friendship ties. Let it be stronger than before. This is one of the test in friendship, testing how strong our bond is. I wish we could be just like the ionic bonding which has a strong electrosis bonding between us that requires a LARGE amount of energy to break us up. I miss you girls, really!

To MRBF:
I shall speak as the third party here. I understand how Elfira feels. If i were in her position, ill do the same too. We girls hate to give hopes. For instance, we arent the type of girls who can easily give numbers to guys or meet them as when as we like. Maybe to our close one. BUT if deep down we knew, theres feelings between us and we dont feel like continuing with it, we WILL take a step back and move on from there. Its not that we're being bias but thats us, women. We dont wish to disappoint others. Even though it may seem to hurt them in a way, but somehow, the hurts will not prolong. Maybe, guys have their own judgement. Maybe guys, they dont understand girl's inner feelings. And when we take a step back and say goodbye, they'll think that we're being bias, being unfair. When actually we're doing things for their own good. Because we care for them. Because we knew that they can find happiness along their way without us. As their happiness is ours. I apologise for stating all this but believe me, im not saying this to win my GF's right. But this is what i feel as the third party. Im being neutral here.

To Elfira and Dee:
Like i said, guys have their own judgement. One thing about them, when they are really sincere, they will wait for us, they will do whatever things just to be with us. Even if it seems to irritate us, but deep down, its because they truly love us. Its a way to prove their sincerity. Bcause to them, if they stop and give up on us that easily, it dosent show their real love for us. Like there's a saying, With efforts and Determination, comes Success. And even though we have no feelings for them, we have no rights to shoo them away. We have no rights to stop them from loving us. We have no rights to get angry with them. Cause feelings is a genuine thing. It comes unknowingly. Sometimes, it just come at the wrong timing but thats when we have to discipline ourselves and let go no matter how hard it takes. Maybe thats what guys think. REAL guys never know the meaning of giving up when it comes to Love. But somehow, along the way, they definitely will find their true happiness. The most vital thing is to be their friend, giving them supports. And giving supports are different from giving hopes. And lastly, to most guys, friendship is what they most prioritise, especially to their close one. Thus, no doubt if their friend were to get frequent hurt, they will go all out to shield their friends even if it takes their life away. Thats why they called themselves as brothers. We girls, have to respect their ''culture''. Again, im not saying this to win both my bf and friend's right, but im stating this as a neutral party.

I hope everything is cleared now. I dont wish to prolong this misunderstanding. And please, Sedangkan Nabi Muhammad s.a.w sedia memaafkan umat-umatnya, apatah lagi kita manusia. Guys, please, Undo the hatreds and spread the Love!

''Dengan beriman kepada Qada' dan Qadar, kita mempercayai bahawa disamping kita berusaha dan merancang akan kehidupan di dunia ini, Allah telah menentukan segala sesuatu itu dan terletak di dalam kekuasaanNya''



To Girlfriends:
''ikatan cinta kita'' bukanlah sebagai jurang perpisahan di antara persahabatan kita.
Now, the three of us have possess the love story of our own, lets not get it come in our friendship way. Forever we will be together through thick and thin. Insyaallah.

p/s: i miss the loyar buruks and the cute arguments between GFs and BF.

Aside everything, the day was still superb with the presence of RIJI(that orange cute stuff above) and FAZEREYN, my sweet madu, the bike FZ150I (:
They both somehow calmed me down. Seriously i treasured them so much! =b
*Oh yaa, being a very good BARTLEYAN JUNIOR, i shall denote MRian's bike, that white SP, LOL!* Hopefully he reads it, DOUBLE LOLs!

To MRrafi, don worry, failures are the mother of success, Im sure the next time round, ull pass the test and then promise us ull bring us go RONDA-RONDA! okay? *winks!*



Ain:
We're like the knots, entangled but never let go.
Hilmi:
If a knot is achieved, we can soon build a bridge with it. Believe we can.

=)))